To The Grave
by Sunflowers In Moscow
Summary: Seven things no one knows about Lily Potter; the truth behind the many assumptions made by the people she knew and those who knew of her. Her complex life, and its curiosities.


_I don't own Harry Potter._

One

**The relationship between Lily and Petunia hadn't always been hateful. **

When Lily was young, long before she entered the magical world, Petunia had been one of her best friends. They had done everything together, so much so that Lily's mother had commented on the fact that her two daughters should have been born twins.

The very first time Lily made a sycamore seed spin through the air in figures of eight in front of her when she was nine, she looked up at her sister for approval, excited at the strange thing she could do. What she was met with was wariness and disgust.

Even when Lily held her beautiful magical son in her arms as she ran up those stairs, leaving her magical husband behind to face their magical enemy, she partially regretted making that seed fly.

Two

**Lily hadn't always hated James.**

When Lily first laid eyes on James Potter, she didn't feel the rush of instant hatred and revulsion she would claim to have felt in her later school years. Instead, it was a sort of curiosity towards the strange boy who laughed far too much to be normal, and his group of equally strange friends.

Lily had always been an outgoing girl, and had almost stepped up to them to ask what they found so funny.

Perhaps if she had, the school relationship she and her future husband would share wouldn't be so violent and one-sided.

However, her intrigue was tampered by the unfortunate yet still there hold her sister still had over her.

"_Boys are icky Lily; stay away from them! Completely!"_

By the time Lily shook the hooks Petunia had dug in her during their childhood, James had already dug himself such a deep hole only a miracle had any hope of getting him out.

Three

**The 'thing' between herself and Severus Snape did in fact, exist.**

And it had progressed far more than anyone – including James – would ever know. She had given the boy who had introduced her to this life her first of a lot of things; the title of her first secret boyfriend, her first kiss.

However, the day Severus had called her a mudblood, had marked more of her firsts.

He was the first boy she had ever and would ever dump.

He was also the first boy to break her heart.

Four

**The relationship between herself and one Remus Lupin had always been platonic.**

This was despite what all of her dorm-mates and even, for a short while, James Potter had thought.

During which time he had completely disowned one of his best friends, to Lily and Remus' dismay and frustration -

Lily had known, ever since she had become close with him, that things would never progress that far. He wouldn't allow them to out of self-hatred and fear.

She would never acknowledge the fact that for a month or two in her sixth year, she had been so lonely she hoped he would.

Five

**Lily hadn't suspected a thing about Peter Pettigrew. **

He was a quiet, rather kind boy who had a rather average school and social life, and while he still went around with the banes of her life, he always knew when to stop, when the next step would be too far.

He had been much like Remus in that aspect, and it was in such moments that Lily both respected him, and knew why the most popular boys in school were friends with him.

Peter was one of a kind.

Later on, as she clutched her baby to her chest and mourned the death of her husband that had occurred not seconds before, she wondered how he had fooled them all, and how she could have been so blind.

Six

**Lily wasn't immune to the infamous Black charm.**

From the middle of third year to the start of fourth, Lily had harboured a humiliating crush on Sirius Black.

It drove her barmy, and almost, almost fuelled her rage more than James did.

It wasn't until two weeks into her fourth year when the crush fizzled out, a process begun by her eavesdropping on a conversation she happened to walk in on between Remus and Sirius.

"So you don't fancy Evans, Moony?"

"No! For Merlin's sake Sirius, give it a rest. If Lily could hear you now, you'd be hexed into next week."

"But… I was only making the way clear for Jamie-boy! He's a muppet, but both he and she deserve someone."

"… you sound like an old man."

"Shut up! I could have said that they deserved each other because they both drive me to the point of jumping of the Astronomy tower and letting Filch scrape me off the courtyard."

"…uh-huh. I didn't think you liked Lily."

"Well, I don't know her, do I? Don't give me that look, you tosser. She seems like a nice enough bird, that's all."

It was then that Lily realised how sensitive he really was, and that, if she let him, he could be a good friend. Once she got past the very rough exterior.

It was because of this moment, all the way back when she was fourteen, that Sirius Black became the loving godfather of Harry James Potter, much to James' delight.

A decision she never regretted.

Seven

**To James, Harry was a happy accident that he loved with all his heart.**

**To Lily, Harry was the darling little boy that she had to feel alive.**

When the state of things finally hit Lily, she was just short of having a mental breakdown.

The war, Voldemort… it was all piling up, and Lily had begun to realise exactly what a slippery slope she was on.

James was never home, away on constant Auror business.

Their little home was empty, quiet apart from when Remus and Peter came over to try and help her cope.

She couldn't see her parents, to keep them safe. Petunia was out of the question. She had lost contact with the school friends who were still alive.

Day after day, she stared at the bare walls, did the paperwork and necessary planning for the Order; just existed.

It was later, after a day or two of thinking, that she stopped taking the pill in anticipation of James' arrival at the weekend.

Six weeks later, when her period definitely hadn't come, she told James'.

He seemed mollified, before bursting out in excitement – she should have known he would act like that.

It was only seven months into her pregnancy that she wondered whether it was cruel to bring a child into the mess she lived on a daily basis.

But it was when she lay, exhausted on a bed holding a tiny, red-faced newborn in her arms that the life rushed back to her.

She looked down at the delicate closed eyes of her deliberate baby and, pulling him closer, snuggled into the warm arms of her overjoyed husband.

She felt whole again.

…**.**

She looked deep into the red eyes of her enemy.

Her body was straight and tall, her movements sure.

Her eyes were bright and dry, despite the fact she knew her husband lay downstairs cooling, and that she would be joining him soon.

She had no fear.

For this man would not get her son.

He wouldn't lay one miserable finger on her boy.

Harry would survive this night, she swore it on her life.

He would survive, because Lily Potter had lived.

And she would die the way she had lived, for her Harry.

Magnificently.


End file.
